S (my friends son who I have been blogging about) is 19. He is the same age as my brother. Today the family have been told it is now highly unlikely he will pull through, his brain monitor has been taken off and there are further swellings. He is now only being kept alive by the ventilator. I cant get my head around it. He will no longer be here. To cause the havoc he always has. But that was S and thats what everyone loved him for.
I spent an hour earlier just driving around crying, trying to calm my mind and make sense that within 24 hours S had gone from being a healthy young lad to being in ITU in a critical condition. Its not fair. Lifes not fair.
You dont die at 19. You shouldnt. No mother should bury their son.
Many a summer were spent in their garden, many a day trip to theme parks. S and his brother M were like my little brothers. I was the oldest and I looked down on them. I have vivid memories.
Lying on the grass in summers evenings cloud spotting.
Riding ride on toys down their slide into their swimming pool
Playing around the back of their big garage
Making my mum ride Rocky Express at thorpe park 1000 times aftera night shift and untl she could no longer take it.
When we were older and were aloud to walk to the shop.
Sitting on their bunkbeds chilling watching TV.
So many memories.
Such an innocent childhood.
A childhood that help no expectations. Only fun.
A childhood now over. A young lad fighting for his life.
Hopefully tomorrow I will be visiting him to say my goodbyes, to remind him of those childhood memories, to hold his hand and pray theres a twitch or a squeeze. I know chances are there wont be. But hope is all I have left.