Its funny isn’t it, how we change when we have children. We grow. We adapt. We survive. We become women.
But something that I really noticed was how suddenly no longer was my friendship group male but it was female. Now that in itself of course isn’t all that surprising really is it!? But for me it was, throughout my teenage years all my best friends had been male, at school, outside of school, the only female friend I had was B and she has remained a constant throughout.
I guess when you fall pregnant and have a child its hard for the male species at the best of times to understand whats going on in a woman’s body and so to listen to your friend rabbiting on about it must be pretty odd. And of course on the other end of it you cant really ask your male friend if its normal for your milk to start coming through at 15 weeks now can you? You can however do that with women.
See being a Mum I feel almost makes you part of this sisterhood group of parents, you’ve all become women, you’ve all birthed, you’ve all produced beautiful children, you’ve all survived winding, sleepless nights, choosing buggies amongst other traumas and so there are those common links.
As your child gets a little older you become slightly more “senior” within the mummy rankings in that the other women can turn to you and check if things are normal, will they survive the terrible twos, will the sleepless nights last forever? You become somewhat of an expert don’t you. A sisterhood that shares its knowledge. A knowledge that these days is shared all over the internet, through blogs, forums, websites where hints and tips are knocked about as well as facebook and twitter where your cry for help will be answered. And so there becomes another sisterhood, the online sisterhood, these fellow mums, all at various stages of parenting, all with their own questions, all searching for their own answers.
Offline we develop our “mummy” friends through Mother and Baby groups, Childrens Centres, NCT Classes, Antenatal Classes. We go along scared of not knowing anybody yet forgetting we all have one thing in common, these tiny people. These tiny people who are all unique and all different and yet similar in so many ways. We get the chance to observe different parenting styles, learning from what we see.
And then of course theres our immediate friends and family. Mothers, Aunts, Grandmothers, Godmums, Sisters. All of who are part of this female race and many of whom have birthed and survived parenthood themselves. All of who are happy to share their knowledge and such with us.
For me, personally, I had a very close knit group of female friends, I still do, although recently I’ve found that to be rapidly changing (thats another post in itself), but this small group are the group I can depend upon for an ear, a shoulder and a kind word or reasoning. These are the people who have been there through thick and thin. These are the people who have seen me at my worst and my best. These are my friends.
|L-R> Bex and Me, Mum and Me, Kylie and Me|
|L-R> Rach n Me, Diz and Me, Emma and Me|