The future is not something we enter. The future is something we create.

The future is not something we enter. The future is something we create.

L. I. Sweet

And these pictures show the moment that I realised that. The first time I EVER held my son. Almost 12 hours after giving birth to him as dawn broke on November 21st 2006 I finally came around enough to give him his first cuddle. 
It wasn’t a long cuddle, I could barely hold him as all my strength seemed to have been drained out of me with the events of the night before. But in that moment, whilst my mother was busy snapping away capturing our first moments I looked at him in awe and wonderment, saying his name over and over in my head, wondering how I had created this little man. 
How I would continue to shape his life and his future for many years to come. 
I wondered if I would ever have this first moment again, I knew the night before had gone badly, but at that stage I didn’t know details. 
At that moment I realised that no matter what life threw at me from now on I had one main focus. 

These pictures are the ones I love to hate that were taken on the high dependency unit only a few hours after I almost died, I look like a swollen wreck having been battered about and lost 4 pints of blood and transfused with 6. But no matter how hellish I look, they represent one key moment. A moment that can never be replayed. 

Dont forget to go and visit the other gallery entrants over at Sticky Fingers.

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